Being a Heroine

Ahhhhhhh free time :) There really aren't words to describe the relaxation that washes over you when you realize there's nothing you HAVE to get done. It's a darn good feeling and one that I don't get often when I'm up at school. So when I come home and am taking a break from school, it's really nice to be able to curl up with a nice book.  

I used to think that I'd out-grown my inner nerd. I've gotten rid of the braces, the glasses, and the constant Disney movie references (well...sort of, on that last one). I'm finally "cool". Ha ha ha. Who are we kidding? I'm definitely just as nerdy as I've always been, I've just finally grasped those all too important social skills that have allowed me to publicly downplay the nerdy instincts. But behind closed doors--and to those friends who know the REAL me--I'm just as geeky as I ever was. I didn't read Harry Potter as a kid; Harry Potter WAS my childhood. I think I was genetically doomed to be a geek. I didn't have a remote chance to turn out cool. I got my first pair of glasses when I was in second grade and we have a picture of me curled up in my dad's burgundy recliner reading "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire" with no glasses on. I wasn't even 8 years old and I was already reading a book with 636 pg book!!! I never had a shot at the cool kids' table.

So I guess it really isn't surprising that even now as I approach my 20th birthday that I still am a huge book-lover at heart. But as I've grown older, my amount of free time has drastically diminished (a fact that I'm sure isn't helped by my intense procrastination and lack of good time management skills) and therefore I haven't read nearly as much as I've liked. But as I've made it a conscious effort to become more well-read, I've realized something that's kinda bothered me:

Where are all of the heroines???

"Umm duh! They're right where they've always been, you're just stupid. You're a huge Harry Potter fan and Hermione is one of the best literary heroines ever!"

Fair point. Don't get me started on how much I love Hermione (and Ginny and Luna and Molly and Tonks---heck, even Umbridge is a pretty well-written character!). But, my friends, the series is not called "Hermione Granger and the Dolt with the Emotional Range of Teaspoon". Harry is the title character and while dear Miss Granger is definitely one of the main characters, her primary role in the story is to support Harry.

Katniss Everdeen has her very own series but...she just gets a little too dramatic and whiny in the third book for me. I give Suzanne Collins her credit--it's a great series and Katniss' reactions are probably very realistic for a warfare situation. There's something to be said for making the end grim, harsh, and taking out all the Disney magical 'happy ending' fluff. Kudos to you. I can acknowledge that. Doesn't mean I have to like how Katniss turns out though.

I've started "Pride and Prejudice" dozens of times--both novel and several different film versions--and I haven't ever been able to get through it. I know, I know. I feel like I won't win many friends for ever admitting this but I'm sorry Jane Austen REALLY doesn't do it for me... I don't see the appeal to Darcy. Sue me, but I don't get it!

It seems to me that heroines tend to fall in 1 of 2 categories: a very tough, tomboy-ish woman with an "I don't need no man" attitude who stubbornly refuses male assistance OR a scantily clad seductress who kicks butt and takes name while appealing in a very sexual way to the male audience.

Is there no happy medium?? There is so much MORE to being a woman than showing lots of cleavage or leaving all the men in the dust while you prove yourself. There's so much more than getting the guy or even playing second fiddle to the guy saving the day. I know I can't be the only girl in the world frustrated with this! I'm sure there are hundreds of dialogues all over the web on this topic and I don't claim to be unique or original with this complaint. But it hurts my heart a little bit.

If I may add a disclaimer, I don't claim to have read every novel ever produced. I tend to stay pretty exclusively within the Young Adult fiction genre and even within that genre I am sure there are dozens of heroines that fall outside of my broad generalization. I stereotyped, and I freely acknowledge that. But seriously: come on ladies! Is it too much to ask for a well-rounded literary heroine who is both feminine AND tough??

I freely admit that I spend (aka waste) WAYYY too much time on Pinterest but I've recently come across a beautiful quote by Zooey Deschanel. I'm sorry, but I really love her. She is goofy, dorky, and yet still classy.

There's something to be said for having some tenderness left in this world. Life is HARD. I feel like women are constantly being told to: "Suck it up! Be a man! Rub some dirt in
it!" (If you didn't read that last quote in an Amanda Bynes' man voice then please visit this link here and educate yourselves on one of my favorite movies EVERRR: 'http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zLSwpjpVmRU).

I think the quota has been filled on women who have 'rubbed some dirt in it'. There's a time and a place for that. But there's a big need for tenderness in this world. Times are hard and a little tenderness would go a long way.

As women, one of our greatest assets is that we are very multifaceted. We're all a little tender, a little sassy, a little quiet, a little scared, a little defensive, a little self-conscious, a little caring, a little funny, a little quirky, a little brave, a little loud, and a whole lot of fun. I don't pretend to understand the many differences between men and women, but I eavesdrop a lot when other wiser people talk about it :) Men compartmentalize much more than women do. We're constantly feeling 85 different emotions at once and jumping from topic to topic to topic. We are COMPLICATED. So I guess it should come as no surprise that, in literature especially, it's hard to capture all of the great strengths of being a lady and put it all out on the page for an audience. To simplify us is to really do us all a great disservice. It can't be easy to write complicated characters--hence why there are so many simplified caricatures and cliches. There are thousands of different voices yelling about how women should behave. I guess I'll just add my own voice to the fray.

No more seductresses. No more tomboys with an axe to grind and an agenda to prove. Just a good ol' fashioned heroine who can get stuff done, while keeping her tenderness, charm, and some witty banter with her male friends. A hero and a lady.


I'd read that book :)